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[Nov. 11th, 2009|08:34 am] |
Is it bad that I would rather spend my two days off cleaning the apartment, working out, lounging around, and fixing dinner for my roommate...than driving out of town to have sex with a potential fuck buddy? *sigh* I mean...I could leave in a few hours and spend the night having sex...which would be GREAT...but...I really need to clean my room. lol. And...I really need to rest cuz my feet are killing me. Spending eight hours on your feet at work isn't fun for someone who has plantar fasciitis. I need a foot massager.
In somewhat related news...I love my roommate!!! In a strictly plantonic, non-prison movie kinda way. :D |
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| I need to start writing again... |
[Oct. 2nd, 2009|05:05 am] |
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| |  pensive | ] |
I spent years...trying to find "the one." That idea - the idea that there is one person that is meant for you...that idea isn't real. There isn't one person. Maybe it's the timing. Maybe you get to a point in your life where YOU are finally ready to settle down...and you find someone else who possibly harbors the qualities that you are looking for...and they are ready to settle down too. So...you settle down together.
But really...when are you ready? I'm exhausted...I'm exhausted from always looking. Right now...I'm not looking. I don't want a relationship...I don't want to settle down...and I don't want commitment. Nothing is forever. You can't promise forever.
Right now...I have friends. Maybe I don't have a lot of friends...but I have a few...and they're good friends. That's what matters. I DO have love in my life - love for myself...love for my job...love for my beautiful friends. I love my new roommate. In some ways, he and I live similar lives. We're not identical and thank god for that! If we were...that would be boring. But...we're enough alike for me to consider him family. He is my chosen family right now...he is my love. That's enough for me...that's enough for me to be happy in this moment. For the first time in my life, I'm not pursuing someone...I'm not trying to get in somebody's pants...I'm not looking... I'm just happy to love someone without the intention of anything more than platonic companionship. It took me 26...almost 27 years to get to this point...where I'm ok with friendship.
I'm just living from one day to the next. Crazy things happen...shitty things happen...so we just do the best we can to move on...move forward...and laugh about it. Because that's what we have to do...that's what gets us by... |
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| 2 years since my last post!!! |
[Aug. 9th, 2009|06:26 pm] |
If anyone still reads my LJ...no...I didn't die. lol. Here is what has happened since my last post in 2007:
- I am in the process of getting an honorable discharge from the Army
- I started transitioning from female to male
- I started going by the name "Drew" in February 2008
- I got top surgery in January 2009
- I started testosterone injections in April 2009 (it's been 4 months so far...)
- My official name change, and gender marker change, will go through on September 14th!
- I'm not really on speaking terms with my family anymore...ever since I came out as trans.
- My friends are being extremely supportive...and I'm lucky to have them in my life.
- I just moved to Buffalo, New York after meeting a really interesting girl at the National Women's Music Festival on July 3rd...so here it is a month later...and we're no longer dating....but I'm staying in Buffalo. I found a job and I'm trying to get by and save some money...until I find my next adventure!
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 28th, 2007|03:46 am] |
I was at a party tonight and was referred to as "he" a lot. It was interesting. One thing about being somewhat of a trans-activist is that people assume things about me...like they assume I'm trans. (And some people thought I was a gay man...like a bio gay man...which was AWESOME!) I actually identify as genderqueer and I really don't care which pronoun people use to refer to me. But it just makes me think about our GLBTQSA organization, Spectrum, and how a lot of Straight Allies are perceived as "gay" just because they are members of the organization. I don't assume anything about anyone anymore. I don't even question someone's sexuality unless I'm sexually interested in them.
So maybe some people referred to me as "he" because they assumed I was trans...or maybe they thought I was a bio gay man...or maybe they just picked the pronoun that they thought I physically identified with. Either way...it's nice not to be pinned in the "female" category every now and then. |
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| new shirt and new haircut |
[Apr. 19th, 2007|10:28 pm] |
I just got a sexy new shirt...and a haircut today...so I thought I'd take a couple of pics. Let me know what you think. I know you can't really see the haircut too well...but when I get some better pics, I'll post them. :)
x-posted in several communities |
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| new pics |
[Jan. 21st, 2007|07:03 pm] |
I know I've been neglecting my LJ...so here are some recent pics:
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| The Casanova Kings 2007 Calendar |
[Nov. 27th, 2006|08:58 pm] |
My drag king name is Hunter Down and the name of my troupe is The Casanova Kings. We recently made a 2007 calendar to raise money for costumes and gas money for out-of-town performances. We'd appreciate it if you guys would take a look and consider helping us out by buying one. (The calendar is on cafepress.com so we're only making a few dollars per calendar) Mainly, I would like opinions on the calendar...so even if you don't plan on purchasing one, take a look anyway! The pictures are HOT! :)
Click the ad below:
Thanks!
~Hunter Down |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 25th, 2006|01:58 pm] |
Grrrr.... I'm so frustrated. I lied, okay? I'm NOT content! Maybe I don't want a relationship right now, but that doesn't mean a little action wouldn't hurt! I might as well be a 15 year old boy right now....my hormones are driving me CRAZY! To anybody that knows me...this is no secret.
To make things complicated....I have another crush. I can't go into detail...but...when I first met this girl...there was no possibility of anything more than friendship. Then, recently, something happened....and it made me think that something COULD happen between us. Now, I can't stop thinking about her... I remember the last time this happened to me, I did some REALLY STUPID things...and didn't get the girl. That was a little different, though...because I didn't really KNOW the first girl that well...and we ended up becoming really good friends, which I don't regret. But this girl....this girl is different. She's already my friend. The weird thing was, I wasn't attracted to her at first. She's not a girl that I would stare at, from across the room, and say "Damn, she's hot!" But...she's turning into a girl that I would stare at, from across the room, and say, "Wow...she's amazing."
She makes me smile...like...genuinely smile. And when I look at her, I can't help but smile...in a way that almost makes me blush.
I don't want to like her...because...well...let's just say she's already in a "relationship." But...in a way, I feel like she doesn't want to be in that relationship...or maybe she's just with that person because they're "safe." Maybe she's scared to find that REAL, PASSIONATE kind of love. Maybe she's afraid she could actually find that kind of love with me. |
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| the gender game |
[Oct. 2nd, 2006|09:28 am] |
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On Friday, my friends and I went to Kings Island for Pride Night. That was fun. :) It was really cool being at an amusement park with so many gay people. The BEST part, I would have to say, is when I was at one of those games where the guy tries to guess your weight (or birthday month, etc.). I decided that I'd go ahead and play because I wanted another stuffed animal. So....the guy says, "I can guess your weight, your age, your birthday month...or....your name." Right at that moment, a drag queen walks around the corner...smiles...and says, "Guess his gender!" LOL....I laughed SO HARD. I love drag queens. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 23rd, 2006|09:53 pm] |
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I got a weird email in response to one of my personal ads online. In the email, the person asked, "How long have you been on T?" (For those of you who don't know what that means...they were asking me how long I have been taking testosterone injections) Um....huh? It was odd, because NO WHERE in my profile, did I say anything about being on T, nor do I identify as a male. I found it interesting that someone could just make an assumption like that. I wasn't really offended...just surprised. |
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| Drag show in Bloomington, Indiana |
[Sep. 16th, 2006|11:07 am] |
x-posted to lots of places
I don't have the official flyer because I was having a format problem (sorry Xavier)
Disclaimer: This ad was made specifically for Hunter Down and Casanova Kings fans. That's the only reason Dean and myself are featured on this particular ad. The title-holders are the other three performers. Dean and I are just amateurs trying to get our names out. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 22nd, 2006|08:21 pm] |
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Just a random comment. I find it humorous that a certain gay bar has a rule that you're not allowed to go there in drag if there's not a drag show that night....yet I've been to Steak N' Shake in drag before. lol |
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| new friend |
[Aug. 22nd, 2006|08:09 pm] |
I made a new friend today. The girl that sat next to me in my Creative Nonfiction Writing class is a XENA FAN! haha! lol....as soon as she said that, her and I started rambling on about Xena episodes and the characters, etc. It was so funny. We talked like we were old friends...and we had only known each other for five minutes. haha. She even said she'd go to the Xena Convention with me next year, if I went. I think I met my soulmate. haha. Nah. It was cool, though.
On another note...I think gay men are taking over the world. When I walk through campus, my gaydar goes off every five minutes. lol. :) |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 16th, 2006|01:31 pm] |
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My town is filled with college freshman moving into dorms. I'm hungry. This means I have to cook, because I can't go out to eat. They're everywhere! lol. *reluctantly goes to the kitchen* |
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| hair...all gone! |
[Jul. 5th, 2006|01:37 pm] |
I shaved my head! I'm not sure how I feel about it yet....check it out! Let me know what you think... :)
Before...
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 3rd, 2006|12:24 pm] |
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I like how my mind works. I was hot...so instead of turning on a fan or the A/C, I just took my clothes off. By the time I realized what was going on, I was half-naked. It's funny how those things just happen. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 22nd, 2006|04:39 pm] |
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Okay so I just looked out my window and my neighbor is laying in is recliner on his balcony. I'm pretty sure he's wearing shorts but all I can see is his bare chest and bare legs (because he's reclining in his chair). I take that back...he's wearing socks. EEK! *closes all the blinds* |
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| funny |
[Apr. 14th, 2006|09:59 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  amused | ] |
I had a conversation with my girlfriend lastnight...haha...I like to ask her random questions....
ME: If both of my arms were broken, would you clip my toe nails?
MY GF: It's highly unlikely for you to get both of your arms broken.
ME: Okay, but what if they were?
MY GF: Then I would hire someone to clip your toenails. We'll find someone.
ME: I can't believe you wouldn't clip my toenails!!! I'd do it for you!
lol...so anyway, I was telling my friend (Celeste) at work about this conversation and she said, "I'd do it for you." Awww...how sweet. So then I said, "yeah, I can't believe you would do it and my own girlfriend won't. She probably wouldn't even help me shower if I had both of my arms broken. Well fuck that. I'd just tell her that I'd ask someone else to help me shower." lol...so then Celeste goes, "Hell, I'll just break both of your arms if that means I can help you shower." LOL!!! That made my night. |
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